You find yourself staring up at an attractive woman in her early forties dressed in smart business clothes. Simultaneously you make a break for it and she scoops a hand down to grab you. Ultimately she's got size and speed on her side and you're scooped up into her palm before you've taken more than a stride or two.
She lifts you up to her face and you feel her two big, brown eyes staring at you. She smiles and slips you into her jacket pocket. You feel her walking and she takes you out inside a smart office in what appears to be part of the university. She lays you on the desk and gazes at you in wonder.
"Aren't you just incredible?", she says, "a human being six inches tall but perfectly proportioned and entirely lifelike, you're either a miracle of physics or a miracle of engineering." She examines you intently whilst murmuring to herself "person or robot, person or robot. Hmmm". If you suspected she was a college professor before, there's something in her demeanor and analytical approach to you that confirms that opinion in your mind.
"I'm a person", you cry, "my name's Joe and I've been shrunk. You have to help me out".
She stares down at you, utterly fascinated. "help you how? What do you need to grow back?"
You explain to her the whole story of the genie and the wishes, whilst admittedly skipping the desire to shrink and all the bits about the harem. She listens intently but, when you've finished, she doesn't speak.
"So will you help me?" You ask.
"I don't think I can, little man. If you were shrunk by science then maybe I could investigate the process and see what I can do to reverse it. But shrunk by magic? Magic shouldn't happen. It shouldn't even exist. Nobody's going to be able to reverse something mankind can't even ebgin to understand. I'm sorry little man but, if that genie's never coming back, then I'm afraid you're stuck like this."
"But surely you must know someone who can do something? Maybe another professor. Someone who's a bit more of an expert on..."
"Anomalistic physics? I'm the closest thing there is to an expert in this entire State.".
"But what will I do?"
She thinks for a moment. "But you've got two options. If you want I can keep hold of you and me and my team can run tests. The tests will be difficult and invasive, the process'll be long and gruelling, you'll find most of what we do psychologically humiliating and I'd estimate our chances of success at less than 1 in a billion. Or you can make the best of your new life. I've got a daughter named Anya. She's not much younger than you - just about to turn eighteen and she's kind, sweet and very attractive. You'd be the best birthday present she ever had. She'd care for you, you'd want for nothing and I guarantee you you'd be well looked after the rest of your life".
You think it through and choose
- The discomfort and invasiveness of being a lab rat.
- The humiliation of being a pet.
Retrieved September 13, 2016